Community is How We Win
Things I learned this week:
Community is how we get through an immediate crisis
Community is how we win in the long term - at almost everything
Early last week, Mike mentioned we should prepare for the coming storm. My initial reaction - because I can only focus on so many large scale disasters at once - was, “what storm?”
Then I saw the forecasts, the long lines, the overpacked carts and empty shelves at the Food Lion. I went into overdrive. Suddenly it felt like we might die if I alone don’t procure several gallons of drinking water, find the flashlight we can only ever locate half the time, and figure out a way to cook hot meals outside. Because if we lose power, our stove won’t work; how will we cook hot meals? I know sandwiches exist. But suddenly it just felt imperative that we be able to COOK HOT MEALS, NO MATTER WHAT!
We are able-bodied people, living within walking distance of gas stations and convenience stores. But these were my thoughts. I’m not usually a panicky girl, but when I am, it’s not pretty. I bought a freestanding fire pit I hope I can return. I scavenged two of the last bundles of firewood from the garden store down the road. If we lose power for several days, I guess we’re ready.
The Velvet Feast, my new monthly series here in Hillsborough, NC returns Saturday 2/14. Potluck 5 pm, Song Swap 6-8 pm.
This month, I asked my guests - songwriter Juliana Finch from Durham and the spunky drums and guitar duo The Couldn’t Be Happiers from Winston-Salem - to come prepared with love songs and breakup songs, because it’s happening on Valentine’s Day.
Bring a dish to share at the potluck and bring a neighbor or friend. $1/ticket goes to Siembra NC. Tickets are sliding scale and limited, so get yours!
Mike thought it was hilarious that I went from no awareness of the problem to “I must fix this all myself!” in such a short time. Then he caught the wrong end of how his laughter made me feel. And thankfully he just tried to be supportive.
Then I remembered to check the Signal chat for Milkweed, my local mutual aid group. GOD BLESS these people - they are a well-oiled machine. They are used to showing up for their neighbors. Needs arise, they figure out together how to fill them. They’re calm, like the heroes who show up after everyone else has worn themselves out. They walk in, flip the switch - because they’ve been here before and know how the machine works - and, crisis averted, carry on with their days. They’re the collective Brad Pitt character of community care. And I am so grateful.
One person was offering extra Buddy heaters for those of us who don’t have a generator or a fireplace. Someone else needed to charge a spare battery for a ventilator for their mom, and someone else had a way to do it. I mean, just typing this is making me tear up because: none of us is alone, friends. Someone has what you need, you know?
I asked if we could borrow a Buddy heater and this neighbor, whom I’d never met before, filled up an extra propane tank, set up a demo to show me how to connect the tank and fire up the heater, and then sent me on my way, guaranteeing us at least one warm room should we lose power and heat. I never found our flashlight. But another neighbor was offering a spare box of candles he didn’t need. His roommate works for a caterer and has boxes and boxes of candles that would otherwise get tossed after weddings. Who knew?
Despite a career built on the kindness of strangers - staying in fans’ guest rooms, making albums paid for by donations from people I’ve never had a long form conversation with - I felt awkward accepting help from these neighbors. Neither of them knew who I was. I looked like someone who had spent a few days panicking and then gone to the gym in a mismatched sweatsuit, flannel shirt and lopsided winter hat that read “UMFM Radio”, which is exactly what I was. I tried in both cases to offer them guest list spots for my next show as a thank you. They both looked at me with a mixture of confusion and pity like, “Isn’t that cute, she thinks I want to come to her little show, poor thing”.
But you know what? It doesn’t matter! Come what may, we will have a warm room in this drafty house. We will have light to read and make sandwiches by. Because these people who don’t know me from Adam do know it’s important for neighbors to show up for each other.
Mutual aid is what social media could only dream of being. We come together, we offer what we have, we ask for what we need, and somehow the symbiosis works.
And Mutual Aid/Community are our strongest option for what we’re facing politically too. Strong communities were the backbone of the Civil Rights movement. They are exactly how people in Minneapolis are able to show up for each other and maintain resilience under occupation right now. Strong local networks are how we take care of each other and stay human. Fascism thrives when we feel isolated. It’s a lot fucking harder for it to do it’s vicious bullshit when we have each others’ backs, when we know each other, when we identify our common needs and how to fill them. Despite the chest thumping and murderous violence, in the long run, fascism is fundamentally weak and we - when we unite - are brilliant and strong. Let’s stop giving our power away to melting orange cartoon men and their paid mercenaries. We are not powerless. Listen to Patti Smith’s anthem People Have the Power. I would stake my damn life on strong community being a better bet than almost anything else we’ve got right now. Let’s be awkward in our mismatched gym clothes right here, in our own neighborhoods, with each other.
Some resources:
In NC:
In MN - share from Gaelynn Lea :
MN Immigrant Rights Action Committee:
https://www.miracmn.com
UNIDOS:
https://unidos-mn.org
Arrive Ministries:
https://arriveministries.org
Podcast Inspiration - How to Survive the End of the World: An Emergency Dispatch from Occupied Minneapolis: “Intense, Frightening, Surreal and Inspiring.”
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Join me and Jenny Reynolds for this Songwriting Workshop AND show Saturday 1/31 in Austin!
We’ll help you channel what you’re feeling into a powerful song, shake off writer’s block, learn some new guitar techniques, meet your fellow songwriters and more!
If you come to the workshop, your ticket to the show is included! The show is also open to the public!
Our inaugural Velvet Feast last month was a wonderful night of music and people! Thanks to my guests Jonathan Byrd, Angel Snow, and all the folks who came, brought a dish and sold it out.
Upcoming Shows - click for tickets - more dates TBA soon!
You continue to be the brightest light in a dark world. Much love.
What a fantastic discovery! Keep it up! Even in less stressful times.